I’m Not Fun-Size, I’m Just Short (Or: How to Be Intimidating Despite Your Lack of Verticality)

8 Aug

If you haven’t gathered from my slew of self-deprecating material, I am indeed quite small in stature. Otherwise known as petite, or fun-sized, or just plain old short. And I’m fine with it; I’m fine with the jokes made on my behalf (hell, I’ve cracked a few myself), I’m fine with the everliving shame of having to roll my pants up at the hem, and I’m trying to be fine with my mother’s constant snide remarks about how she’ll always be 2 inches taller, as if 5’4″ is a world above 5’2″ (1.58 meters to those of you on the metric system, aka most of the world). I’m tall enough to ride rollercoasters (read all about it) and to drive without sitting on a phonebook, and that’s as tall as I’ll ever need to be.

Lately though, I’ve realized that height has more advantages than being able to reach the top shelves of Target. Height automatically garners respect through automatic intimidation. My appearance will never be commanding or intimidating. I’ll always look the part of the lost little girl, despite being just as capable and mature as my taller counterparts (sometimes). Which is sad, but not hopeless. I’ve learned to hold my back straighter, and my head high, and to not stand by the tallest of my friends in group photos. I’ve learned to exude false confidence when all I want to do is slouch in the corner, because my height won’t do the work for me. I’ve been told I have a tall personality; whether this was an attempt to up my self-esteem or a genuine compliment, it’s something I’ll strive to continue.

Have you ever been uncomfortable about your height? What do you do about it? I like tall shoes myself, but I’ll be the first to admit that flats are much more comfortable 🙂


4 Responses to “I’m Not Fun-Size, I’m Just Short (Or: How to Be Intimidating Despite Your Lack of Verticality)”

  1. madgirlblue200 August 11, 2013 at 2:30 pm #

    You do have a tall personality. You always look composed, whereas tall people (me) have a problem with looking blunt around the edges and generally awkward. When your eyeshadow matches the intricate details of your bracelet and shoes, people notice. And we agree that pants are overrated anyway.

    • Olivia August 11, 2013 at 3:42 pm #

      Haha thanks Mad, I appreciate it 😀 Pants are terrible terrible things…except the colorful ones. I want those pink ones of yours.

  2. hannie10h August 9, 2013 at 11:00 am #

    I love heels. Like love them. But apparently being a giant is frowned upon. “You don’t need heels.” No shit. I like them.

    Being tall has at least one disadvantage, enjoy your wedges because imma hafta wear my flats

    • Olivia August 9, 2013 at 2:04 pm #

      I have to say I don’t like when my tall friends wear heels because of the glaring height difference, but they always look gorgeous no matter what 🙂 Never be afraid to be a little taller!

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