My Worst Fear

3 Jun

I’m fairly proud to say that, aside from the unwillingness to kill a spider unless contained beneath a pound of toilet paper (I don’t like the crunching squishy feeling), I’m afraid of very few things. As a new driver, I’ve made peace with the possibility of death to the point where I can have humorous conversations about scattering my ashes around my computer with my friends and family. Dying doesn’t scare me like aging does. 

As a makeup fanatic, I’ve become very aware of the diminishing quality of our skin as we age. While my younger siblings can be undereye circle-free despite being wide-awake until the wee hours of the morning and acne-free despite not washing or caring for their skin in any way, I am forced to put some effort into the appearance of my skin. My mother’s self-consciousness about her skin stems from the increasing number of age spots and fine lines she discovers. I’m frightened by the undeniable truth that, although I may spend hours of my time meticulously applying sunscreen, lotion, and eye cream, my skin will wrinkle and crease and sag just as yours will (sorry to bring it up). 

I’m not going to preach about sunscreen because, up until last year, I didn’t give a hoot what UV rays were doing to my skin. I still don’t like wearing it because the consistency reminds me of bacon grease (as tasty as it is, I don’t want it on my skin), but I force myself because I don’t want to end up looking like this:

Or worse, get this:

This might (ok, does) sound like the most frivolous fear in the world, but I’m a perfectionist by nature and I hate the idea of covering up my face with layer upon layer of foundation just to achieve the skin that I take for granted now. 

Oh and also I’m afraid that Slenderman will come into my room while I’m sleeping, snatch me from under the sheets, and eat me. Or whatever it is that he does. 

What are your worst fears?


5 Responses to “My Worst Fear”

  1. placesivegonepeopleivemet June 3, 2013 at 4:06 pm #

    Ghosts, not the dark but seeing something coming at me in the dark, heights, fire, knives, guns, being too close to fireworks, getting kidnapped, the eyes on potatoes… etc..

    • Olivia June 3, 2013 at 4:08 pm #

      Ok now I feel slightly better about myself:) When you said heights, I remembered that I am afraid of ladders but not, for some reason, heights. I am a huge weapon fanatic unfortunately, I have too many knives and swords and bows and such. I need a new hobby.
      Thanks for sharing though:)

    • curlycoops June 3, 2013 at 4:09 pm #

      waking up one day fifty years from now and realising I’ve done nothing with my life

      • Olivia June 3, 2013 at 4:12 pm #

        That frightens me as well…;)


  1. Blindness | Eye Have A Lot of Feelings - June 19, 2013

    […] few weeks ago a wrote a post on my worst fear, but I wasn’t being completely honest. I am afraid of getting old and rather paranoid about […]

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